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Men can experience pleasure, desire and orgasm with a soft penis. When men reach out to me, it's usually about their fears surrounding having and sustaining erections. The issue is that we have taught men that they are broken if they cannot get hard. Losing your ability to get a hard on or sustain one for a long period of time might actually be a gift to your partner, especially if you both can see it as an opportunity to learn what is available in the spectrum of sexuality and love making. Soft cocks can feel pleasure and have orgasms. Men are always expected to be "penetrative" -- and not "receptive" -- when it comes to sex.

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What if we allowed men to really feel the pleasure and intimacy of sharing a soft penis with their lover shamelessly? So we shame them, and they withdraw. Men -- just like women -- worry about getting it on. Think about bringing the focus to soft movements, breath, eye gazing and body-to-body connection. Many people ignore the soft cock. A lack of sex in a marriage, however, can turn couples into buddies or quasi-roommates and make that special spark even harder to ignite. So please do not take it as an indicator that your lover doesn't want you.

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