My wife is a lesbian

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We were both in a hell of our own making. All couples go through dry spells in the bedroom. She has arranged to see a counsellor on her own to explore what her sexuality is, so she can "move on". She says she loves me and our family, but that if she is gay, our marriage must end. Have I been in denial? Did I make them gay? However, you are also furious with her because she is not the person you thought she was, or the person you want her to be.

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Help, my wife is a lesbian!

My wife became distant and now says that she had been suppressing her attraction to her friend with whom she has remained in contactand feels she must now accept that she might be gay herself and can't rule out a relationship with this woman, who she has since admitted kissing. If you don't feel that you could adjust to a marriage without sex, you may decide to separate from your wife, to make it easier to find a partner who shares your sexual orientation. I understand that she wants to "find herself", but I feel powerless and bewildered. Your wife's reason may be both understandable and unavoidable, but that doesn't change the fact that you are the one being left out in the cold. My wife and I are on the rocks.

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